“Hear ME, HERE me”

“Hear ME, HERE me”© 2009 Khalilah-Yasmin

I’m dealing with cards that someone else gave me,
searching for an answer, and there’s nothing to save me..
I fall,
I fall,
I reach for a hand that’s not there…
There’s nowhere to turn to, my life seems so unfair..
I’ve forgotten how to cry because HE told me I cried too much,
but didn’t realize I cried as well, when he leaned in to touch.
Fuck, Looking in my closets at the demons I pretend to not see,
I ignore them all day, yet I know they see me.

I’m saving a LIFE, that someone else gave me,
I’m a torn wild mess, with nothing to tame me.
But solstice and silence where my heart beats so loud,
I can hear it beat through my body through the drums of a crowd.
I’m strong but I’m weak, I shut up while I speak,
Holding in what you pushed away, when you hurt me that day…

Watching my world tear down before me,
you want me to smile because you pretend to adore me,
There’s more to me, that you ever bothered to find,
I gave you my most prized, my high, I gave you my mind.

I’m fighting a war that someone else gave me,
because I’m still alive, you point and you blame me.
I’m ashamed see, because I don’t want to feel so strong,
how can someone be so hurt for so long?

How is everyone even down to even her kin,
the rejection she feels in a heart born in sin.

I fall,

I fall,
reaching for a hand that’s not there
I want to run, but to another emptiness?  WHERE?

Living in a world, where we fend for ourselves,
I fall
I fall,
born alone, and still by myself.

Seeing a reflection of peace but a heart that is weary,
I’m crying inside, and no one can hear me.